Welcome to our family blog!

This blog was started in October 2010 shortly before our daughter, Abigail Grace, was born. She was diagnosed at our 18 week ultrasound with Holoprosencephaly (HPE), and we were preparing for a child with very complex medical needs and a shortened life expectancy. Abby was born on November 12th and sadly passed away just four days later. This blog follows me, Matt and Abby’s big brother, Connor, along our journey from preparing for Abby’s birth through our adjustment to life without her.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Remembering to be Thankful

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and it is also Matt’s birthday.  As you may expect, we are in no mood to celebrate anything, but we’ll go to dinner for Connor.  He deserves to have the normalcy of Thanksgiving dinner with family.

Despite the fact that we’re sad in ways that our language is insufficient to describe, there are always reasons to be thankful.  I’m putting some in writing to remind myself should I forget.

I’m thankful for…

  • Our family who has shown us immeasurable support through all this.  I don’t know what I would do if my mother didn’t come over each day to make sure Matt and I are still functioning and taking care of Connor.  
  • Our friends who have shown support but respectfully given us space to grieve. 
  • Our Church community for making impossibly painful arrangements as easy as possible, and for sending over endless dinners along with their prayers.
  • The Families for HoPE organization and the entire HoPE community of parents, children, and angels.  As another mother mentioned on the HoPE blog, they really helped us prepare for Abby’s arrival.  
  • The Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep organization and Alex Terry, the photographer they sent to the hospital to take our beautiful family photos before Abby passed away.  I was nervous about having a photographer come, but Matt and I are so, so grateful for the beautiful photos she took.  What a gift to give a family going through this.
One of the many beautiful messages we’ve received said I reminded her that motherhood is an honor and a privilege, which we sometimes take for granted. How true that is!  I am most thankful for my husband and son.  Instead of pulling and pushing against each other in our attempt to get by through our sadness, we’re taking turns being strong so we can lean on and hold each other to get through it. 

Coincidentally, November 25th is also National Holoprosencephaly Awareness Day.  One year ago I had no awareness of this condition whatsoever.  I sincerely thank those family and friends who made a donation to the Families for HoPE in Abby’s name.  Families receiving an HPE diagnosis need this organization for resources and support.

We HoPE your family has a happy and blessed Thanksgiving.